Finding Ad

In China, when a baby is found, an ad is placed in the local newspaper with the baby's picture and particulars, such as when and where she was found and any identifying features she might have. This is particularly precious to have as it is usually the first and only baby picture you will ever have of your child.

We were fortunate enough to stumble upon http://www.research-china.org/ . Brian Stuy is a Texan who has married a Chinese woman and they have created a business that tracks down your baby's original finding ad and sends it to you with a translation. We, of course, not only ordered the ad, but the DVD of Fuzhou including the orphanage and foster families in the area and their homes.

When we received Amy's ad, it was such an emotional experience. I had read about these and knew what to expect, but Robin had thought there would be a small article in the paper about a baby being found. Instead, when we acquired the actual newspaper, the Jiangxi Economic Daily, published on May 8th, 2006, it contained a full page with 150 tiny pictures with brief descriptions attached. Among this was our baby.

Her ad was translated to read:
Fu Ni Gan
She was born on March 20, 2006.
On March 27, 2006 she was found at the gate of the Science Society of Fuzhou.
She has light skin and big eyes.

How bittersweet to now possess a picture of her when she was four or five weeks old, but also to see how many other babies were in need of families.

Care Package

On August 17th, we received the address of Amy's orphanage and I could finally box up all the goodies I had been collecting to send her. Included was an outfit, a stuffed dog, little balls, books, a very soft duck blanket, a disposable camera, and Canada flag stickers and candies for the other children and the nannies. We also added a soft baby book photo album with pictures of our family, all carefully labeled in my very best Mandarin script!

I located a letter on the Internet that was written in Mandarin and English that expressed our gratitude to the orphanage and nannies and told of our excitement and anticipation in welcoming Ni Gan into our family. It also asked that they use the disposable camera to take pictures of everyone and anything at the orphanage, so that we and Ni Gan will have images of her and her environment prior to our arrival.

Then it was off to the post office to mail. She should have it in two weeks. How exciting! Our first contact with our daughter!

Imunizations

On August 15th, Robin and I went to the Travel Health Clinic to get our immunizations for the coming (but not soon enough) trip.

After a very informative discussion with our nurse, we received immunizations for hepatitis A and hepatitis B, polio, diptheria, and tetanus. In September, we will return to get the second round of hepatitis shots and in October, we will need the flu shot.

It was surprising the such a little needle could make your arm ache for days after! Robin was very brave and did not faint during the procedure.

Baby Shower

For the past two years I have been attending university full time to become a school psychologist. On August 8th, my classmate Danica hosted a dual shower - a baby shower for me and a wedding shower for another of my classmates, Lyla. It was wonderful to see everyone and discuss the upcoming changes in our careers.

I was the lucky recipient of some lovely gifts such as beautiful outfits, great summertime toys, a special keepsake bank and a bountiful selection consisting of a book, photo album, stuffed elephant and much more!

A huge thank you to some great friends with whom I will always share a special connection.

How was Your Summer?

After teaching on an isolated reserve up North for just over two years, I promised myself I would never again wish time away. Although I tried to relish every moment of the excitement of the wait, I found myself doing just that this summer - wishing the time away. I have never wanted the summer to pass, nor have I ever yearned for school to start in the fall, but I certainly did this year!

To keep busy, I've tried to do every project that might need doing in the next three or four years. This list includes painting the fence and deck, reworking some of the patio around the pool, creating a new flowerbed, refurbishing existing flower gardens with soil and bark, and digging up the vegetable garden and recreating it as a sandbox. In the house, I still have to paint Amy's room (or as some might call it, Robin's office), and paint the laundry room ceiling and the bathroom downstairs.

I am also waiting for a few rainy days to sew Amy's nursery linens. We have purchased a crib, but plan on setting up the room once we get our LOA, so there is no real rush yet (yes, I am tempting fate!!).

On a sad note, our beloved Bichon Timmy passed away after 14 years of unconditional love and dedication on July 11th. He was going blind and deaf and I was so worried about how he was going to manage with a toddler around the house. I tell myself that, if ever there was a good time to leave us, this was it. He will always have a special place in our hearts.

Where in the World is Amy?

Amy is currently living in Jiangxi Province in the south of China. Her orphanage is located in the city of Fuzhou.

According to http://www.maps-of-china.net/ , the province is surrounded on three sides by mountains and hills, with hilly lands occupying its central part and a vast plain lying on the northern part. The five rivers-Ganjiang River, Xinjiang River, Pojiang River, Xiushui River and Fuhe River, all drain into the Poyang Lake, the largest freshwater lake in China.

Jiangxi enjoys a subtropic humid monsoon climate with the annual mean temperature being 16-20° C. The annual average rainfall is 1200-1900 mm. In November when we go (fingers crossed), the average temperature is 15° C in Jiangxi and 0° C in Beijing.

The province possesses green mountains and clear waters. Mount Lushan, Mount Linggang and Mount Longhu are all famous scenic areas. Jiangxi is also a province with a revolutionary tradition, where the August 1, 1927 Nanchang Uprising took place.

Porcelain and porcelain engravings are the most well known local products in Jingdezhen. Bamboo woven articles in Yanshan, fire crackers in Wanzai, and fireworks in Pingxiang, also enjoy fame in China. The traditional local products - Yunwu tea of Lushan, green tea of Wuyuan and bamboo shoots in Mount Jinggang are all also popular.

Now What??

After the initial excitement, the first question everyone had was "When will you get her?". Unfortunately, there is no straight answer for that!

On July 3rd, 2007 we received the actual paperwork that needed to be signed and sent back to China via our agency and the Province along with our Letter of Intent (LOI) to adopt Amy. It arrived in China and was entered into their system on July 12th. At this point, we wait . . . for approximately 100 days . . . until China sends us a Letter of Acceptance (LOA) to again enquire if we are certain this is the child we want to bring into our family (as if the similar haircut wasn't a sign!). Once this is signed and returned to China, two or three weeks later, the invitation to travel (TA) along with the dates and itinerary for the trip are received. The date of departure is usually two or three weeks after that. We would receive Amy into our family the day after arriving in China and would stay for approximately two weeks before returning home.

With this convoluted formula in mind, we hope to receive our LOA by October 20th, 2007, our TA by November 10th, depart on December 1st, and arrive home with Amy on December 15th. Of course, things may happen sooner or, perish the thought, later. We have no control over this whatsoever. The waiting continues . . .

Amy

Our baby is called Fu Ni Gan in China. As is the case with all the other children from the Fuzhou Social Welfare Institute, her last name is Fu (listed first, in accordance with the practice in China). Her first name is Ni Gan, given by orphanage officials; however, we will be naming her Amy Clara Nigan. Clara was my Grandma's first name and my Mom's middle name - two very important and influential women in my life.

Amy's birthday was on March 20th, 2006. She was found on March 27th and has lived in the orphanage since then. According to the report that we received with her referral, when she was a year old she was 8 kg and 72 cm. She had 8 teeth, was a moderate sleeper and was crawling. At that point, she was able to use her pincher grip and loved to imitate words. She was also fond of music and bath time, playing with toys, and reading picture books.

The medical need that Amy has is a ventricular septal defect (vsd) which is an opening or a hole in the wall between the right ventricle and the left ventricle of her heart. We have already consulted with our pediatric cardiologist, who has informed us that this is fairly common in children and may very well grow over in time. Although she will not be able to give us a definitive answer until she sees Amy, it is also possible that she may need surgery.

Needless to say, we are completely overjoyed! She seems to be the perfect baby for our family in so many ways, from her love of music like her grandmother, her love of the water like myself, her love of talking like her sister, her love of books like her brother, and her amazingly similar haircut to her Dad's!

June 28, 2007

June 28th started like any other day. I went to work and Robin had a hearing. At the lunch hour, Robin and his client came back to the office. While he was speaking with the client, Maureen, his assistant, told him there was a call from CAFAC. Robin initially declined to take the call, suspecting it was yet another request for yet another document; however, at Maureen's prompting, he picked up the call. On the line was a representative of CAFAC, who began the conversation by saying "I have some good news!" Robin, who is known for his stoic nature, began to sob. Eventually, he heard confirmation that we had a referral!

CAFAC sent an email, which Robin quickly opened. The client began to cry, Robin continued to cry, Maureen gave Robin a hug and then he commenced a desperate effort to reach me. As it turned out, I was lunching with colleagues and could not be reached, no matter how many times Robin tried my cell phone because, as is my practice, I did not have it turned on!

After many frantic calls to the cell phone and the School Division office, I strolled into the building to be greeted by the receptionist who told me to phone my husband right away. I knew by the smile on her face that it was the news for which we had been waiting and hoping. I ran to the nearest phone, which happened to be located in the staff room, and called.

"Have you read your email? We have our baby!!"

At that point, I dropped the phone and ran to the computer room, where I opened the best email I've ever read. I called Robin from there, but there was no point - my screams had alerted my co-workers and I was inundated with well-wishers. Robin gave up trying to talk to me and returned to his hearing, where he proudly showed a picture to explain his late return. In the circumstances, the delay was excused.

Needless to say, the rest of the afternoon was not particularly productive. Coincidentally, my niece, Laura, was graduating that afternoon from high school. I went to the graduation and then Robin joined us at the grad celebration at my brother's house, where we introduced our little girl to my Dad, my sister and my brother and his family. We then visited with my Auntie Marilyn, who did not disappoint and produced an impressive flow of waterworks.

When we got home, we discovered a lovely collection on the kitchen counter - a big stuffed Eeyore and a variety of baby things that Kristin had been collecting for her new little sister.

Neither of us slept well that night, as what had been an abstract dream for almost exactly a year had become the reality of the beautiful baby we could not stop staring at.

The Hardest Part is the Waiting . . .

Eventually, our dossier was finished. All the pieces of paper and the photographs that we submitted became a dossier which was reviewed by the Province and submitted to the Chinese authority which deals with international adoption. Once the dossier has been submitted there is really nothing you can do . . . but wait.

Fortunately, I hit upon an activity which helped to pass the time - shopping! As a result, Robin thinks Amy has enough clothes so that she will never have to suffer the indignity of wearing the same outfit twice in one year!

In April and May of this year we grew increasingly despondent. Although it is impossible for the agencies in Canada to predict when a match might occur, we had received an indication that we might expect a referral of a child in April. Unfortunately, although some children in the Waiting Child program were referred, we were not among the lucky families. As a result, the wait continued.

The Waiting Child Program

Approximately 18 months ago, in early 2006, the process for adopting children from China began to slow significantly. As a result, a journey which had previously taken a year or so was now taking longer and longer, in some cases amounting to three years. A discouraging prospect for someone eager to adopt.

At the seminar in November of 2006, we learned for the first time of the Waiting Child program. This program seeks families for children who have medical issues. The families are asked to specify the medical conditions that they are prepared to accept and, if there is a child with one of those conditions who is in need of a family, a match is made.

The advantage for the family is that the Waiting Child process can be much quicker. After much discussion and debate regarding the various medical conditions, we decided to enter into that program. This involved further paperwork and an amendment to our homestudy.

After the Fireworks

Once the fireworks were over, Robin explained that he had been thinking about the possibility of us adding to our family. At that time, Sean was 24 and working in Toronto and Kristin was 21, going to university, and living in the basement. Up until this point, our plan had been not to add to our family; however, Robin told me that he had been doing some research by speaking to people he knew who had gone through the adoption process and wondered whether I would be interested in considering the possibility. I deliberated for 3 milliseconds and quickly announced that I thought it was a wonderful idea. Robin doesn't get many ideas, but when he does, they're good ones!

When we got home, Robin showed me the package he had obtained from CAFAC, a local organization which facilitates international adoptions. We quickly embarked on a long voyage through endless paperwork. Included in that journey were the following:

1. letter of application


2. four letters of reference from close friends


3. lengthy autobiographies


4. detailed questionnaires


5. completion of medical questionnaires by our physicians


6. tax returns


7. net worth statements


8. criminal record and child abuse registry checks


9. letters from our employers


10. pictures of our home and community


11. document appointing a guardian


12. guardian's net worth statement

Once we had begun the process by submitting all these documents, we then had to be the subject of a home study. This involved a number of visits with a social worker. Although we had both studied for many examinations in our lives, this was one exam we could not do any prepatory work for! It is a little unsettling having aspects of your personal history revealed to determine whether a third party thinks you might be qualified to raise a child; however, we passed!

In the midst of that process, we were also required to attend a two and a half day seminar focussing on both the adoption process and parenting of a child from another country. We are pleased to report that we have the certificate to prove we passed that as well!